Sunday, May 3, 2020

Funny new rules at Edwards Animals

Here is a list of some funny new rules that have recently been implemented at the barn, enjoy!  😁
  1. If you're not smarter than the chickens then please do not enter the chicken cage.
    •  Running from chickens or roosters is a quick way to train a them that they are tougher than you.........  Fun Fact: they aren't. 
  2. If a gate was closed, KEEP it closed.  Were you born in a barn or something? 
  3. The big round pen in the middle of the pasture is meant to keep animals in there.  See rule #2.
  4. Don't ride the goats if your over 13 years old. 
    • you probably shouldn't ride the goats at all unless you want to get a swift nip in the butt!
  5. If a horse is galloping your way, you should probably move.. 
    •  If you don't step aside for an animal that can weigh up to 2000 lbs it's probably a quick way to earn a trip to the hospital.  Good thing the hospital is right up the street.
  6. Calling our llamas alpacas is a banishable offence.  
  7. A wise person once said, "Not our pasture not our problem." We follow this rule vigorously! 
  8. Do not lie 
    • Liars get put on poop patrol and big animals make big poop.  SO it's in your best interest not to.
  9.  Don't come to the Animal Rescue not expecting to work a bit.  Work is work, it needs to get done.  Please do not lie and say you have homework. (See rule 8).  
  10.  Lynda is all knowing and wise.  She's worked with animals her entire life, she's seen enough crap to see through yours. ( See rule 7) 
  11. It's probably not the best idea to wear white shoes, but if you decide to, don't complain if they get dirty!  
    • Who would have thought your white shoes would get dirty?..  In the dirt...  
    • Shoes with decent traction are highly recommended!
  12. Bring your common sense and leave your attitude at home.  Yes, you need common sense when working with animals.  Who would have thought?
Brought to you by Emily

The disclaimer...
The rules listed above may have a funny undertone but most fall under the common sense category and  should not be taken lightly.  
For a list of actual rules and guidelines please see Lynda with any questions. 

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